After I became a mom I became really interested in time management techniques out of necessity or maybe desperation. One tip I have heard over and over again is to not let the so called "urgent" things take up all your time so that you never get to what's really important. My son means everything to me and I realize that in order to be a happy person and therefore a good mom I need time for my art. I was very lucky to be able to hire my parents to babysit so I could make beads since there is no multitasking when it comes to melting glass.
However, a massive chunk of my business and work time is spent on selling, shipping, photographing and all of that has to happen while I'm also watching my son. It's incredibly overwhelming and completely crazy making at times. I've learned to accept the fact that I can be a good mom and a good business owner only if I'm ok with being a TERRIBLE housekeeper. I actually love to clean and organize and I love living in a clean organized space. Tidying up my house seems like it needs to be an URGENT task when I'm overwhelmed but if I focused on it all the time I would never sell any beads. Then of course I would have to stop making them because I wouldn't be able to pay my parents for watching my kid while I make them.
So sometimes I have to just let my dishes pile up in the sink so that I can get my packages shipped with eBay's required shipping time. Sometimes when the art supplies strewn all over the table have already failed to entertain, I have to haul out a box of legos and helplessly watch them get spread out all over the floor to keep my three year old entertained while I answer messages.
Shortly after my son was born I got into paring down my possessions and the whole concept of minimalism and minimalist living fascinated me. I pared down my stuff a lot and though it helped somewhat it didn't keep dirty dishes from piling up in the sink.
Last year I got obsessed with The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing. In the book the author says to focus on the things you really love and
want to keep and to get rid of everything that does not "spark joy." I got rid of a TON of stuff, in fact it took over three trips to Goodwill with my car packed to get rid of it all. I don't miss any of it and I also learned how to fold and put away clothes without having my dresser be in the same chaotic state within a week. Though I would still really recommend the book I now realize that my obsession with it was due to the fact that I bought into a unrealistic fantasy.
Author Marie Kondo does not run a business from within her home that is currently undergoing renovations. She doesn't live with a pack rat husband and doesn't have a bratty toddler with daily irresistible impulses to the throw the few possessions that "spark joy" for her across the room. My expecting the same kind of perfect home that she so eloquently describes in her book was the same as when I was a little girl and wished I had the same natural blonde hair and proportions as my Barbie doll. My reality is slightly different.
My reality is accepting the possibility of experiencing the excruciating pain of stepping on a lego on the way to the bathroom in the middle of the night. My reality is having the beautiful things that "spark joy" occasionaly broken or having to pack them away in boxes unused and unloved until the day comes that my kids no longer need to hold my hand, snuggle multiple times a day and are also finally old enough to not break my crap.
Instead of wishing for that day to come sooner I choose to accept my beautiful chaotic mess of a life. I still get overwhelmed. Everyday I get overwhelmed. But I'm learning to take a deep breath and just let the mess and the chaos and all the urgent undone things be.
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